1.) Wear festive Christmas sweater
2.) Go to Algiers Point via ferry
3.) Imbibe at coworker's house
4.) Drunkenly knit with coworker
5.) Pet cats while drinking and knitting with coworker
6.) Watch the only good Christmas movie, which is of course Die Hard starring Bruce "Santa" Willis
7.) Go back to the Quarter via ferry and cavort according to whatever is still open
8.) Refrain from offering bus driver a 40 while on the way home
9.) Eat some pumpkin pie
10.) Play Bowie on vinyl and clean the house
11.) Watch my favorite comedy, Hot Rod,
12.) Cry anyway after realizing that Hot Rod was introduced to me by the BFC, who I could be spending time with right now if I weren't still in the deep south
13.) Carry Rufus around the house like a teddy bear and, sobbing, quote Hot Rod to him until he scratches my arm and gives me staph
14.) Drink some more
15.) Drunk dial mother at 2 am, leave rambling voice mail
16.) Drunk dial Sam at 2:15 am, leave rambling voice mail
17.) Drunk dial Emily at 3 am, leave rambling voice mail
18.) Drunk dial dad at 4 am; become confused when he picks up the phone and proceeds to happily chat with me because he never sleeps and is also probably a bit drunk. Hang up.
19.) Ignore calls from dad until 5:30 am
20.) Pass out in the kitchen with dog at 6
Nahhh, just kidding. I'm only doing 1-10, with a little bit of praising The Lord Jesus Christ in between.
You know what I realized? My mom asked me to make up a list of things that I want, and I couldn't really think of anything in particular except for one book. Easy enough, right? The only problem is that the book happens to be by Dawkins.
Somehow I don't think my mom would be thrilled about buying me a book about atheism for Christmas. Well... hey, at least it's not one of those really bitter atheist books a la Christopher "religion makes me so MAD FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" Hitchens, right? I've read Dawkins' "The God Delusion" and while the tone is definitely a bit sassy at times, he does a very good job, I think, of presenting both sides of the argument while not downplaying his own as a scientist. It's obviously a personal narrative but it isn't a shrieking, angry manifesto so much as a meticulously logical approach to the question of deism in general. He kinda reminds me of what would have happened if Carl Sagan had done more than very gently prod at the subject in "Demon Haunted World", though I really don't think anyone could be quite as nice about calling out superstition in general as Sagan was. Even when the guy was pointing out how idiotic it is to believe that, say, George W. Bush is secretly a reptilian alien from planet Blargenflargen, he wasn't really insulting the people who did believe that stuff. He was telling them why they just might be (BUT MAYBE AREN'T I MEAN YOU NEVER KNOW!!) wrong while patting them on the head and giving them a great big hug and probably shoveling candy into their coat pockets.
tldr; For Christmas, I will be performing an ancient Sumerian necromancy ritual with intentions of raising Carl Sagan from the dead. Feel free to join me, especially those of my friends who are virgins!